Thursday, May 16, 2019

When the Day meets the Night // When the Moon felt the Sun

Hi Dears,
Firstly I would like to say that this title is a nod to a band I used to listen for a long time... Would you be able to recognize it ? ;)
If I recall this time of my life, oh dear, I was so full of dream... My dad was still here, I just started to dig in my heart. Digging for answers, to Life, to what's inside me, to music, to my place in this world.
I know it sounds a bit crazy but listening to it once again I felt like; alright I haven't been losing myself so much these last years. I may have been into dark places but I always tried to find some light in it.
Poke Dumbledore of course ;)

And I must say this is a new series shot by my boyfriend and I love how sharp it looks like me. (yes i did use my name, don't be jealous lol)
I loved shooting with tons of different photographers but oh how I love when it's easy and simple, sometimes photography is more than a great camera, it's more of a vivid capture. Capturing when the model feels at ease and connects with the inner self.
 With him, I don't know why (alright you folks know why cause I'm in love that's obvious lol) but I feel like there is a deep connection to what I really am and another human being. Like, I don't say that I didn't had this connection before but I feel like I am not pretending to anything anymore I feel true , and I feel sincere. I am at a stage of a rebirth but from myself. And feeling this connected to someone who bonds you with nobody else but yourself. Wow, what a powerful feeling.

When the sun found the moon
She was drinking tea in a garden
Under the green umbrella trees
In the middle of summer
When the moon found the sun

He looked like he was barely hanging on
But her eyes saved his life
In the middle of summer (summer)


Headscarf from Modanisa
Ear Loops from Bershka
All clothes are thrift
Heels from Primark


Friday, May 03, 2019

Golden Lupinus

Hello Dears,

I hope everyone's great !
I'm fighting with anxiety (oh again?) these days. Like not the usual depression just massive hits of anxiety. I had problems with my neighbors, problems with my work/social allowance, and this without mentioning the fact that since I'm here I am so unable to have social activities. I don't even try now, like I even have "symptoms" that pops up to make me avoid people.
I struggle when I have to take the metro, when there is too many people around me, when I know that there is something planned.
Taking things one by one is still very difficult to me.
But I often remember to write "those" lists ; haha made me look like a maniac. It's just that I find it more enjoyable and I have to admit I love to write lists since I'm very young 😂

Anyway, tell me if you too feel like really socially awkward but people think you're cool and stressless 😂


"Kimono" from a market
Thrift Belt
Tube skirt and Lace long sleeved top by Modanisa
Earrings by Rosegal
Vans old skool


Thanks again to my sweet bf 📷  Lionel

Thursday, April 11, 2019


Hi Dears

I hope you are all well. It has been three weeks since I started work again. I'm already all stressed out! Hopefully I have really nice people around me. My staff at work are awesome with me , very helpful. I try not to feel too guilty because in fact as a manager I work less than them, which in a way sounds a bit weird. But they're aware about my health and they are very kind to me.
In fact, in a day I only work 5h and afterwards I am already kaput ! All drained from energy lol
So my needs in particular,.. my sleep needs are becoming more intense... I'm a bit like a baby now ! 
Thanks to my boyfriend too I'm also keeping a good shape, he is so kind and respectful to me I'm very grateful because that's helping me a lot.
I hope this could only get better with time. For the moment all I need is to stay stable and calm.

What do you do when you are feeling cranky like that ? And who's the most helpful people to you ? Or even what are your activities? I had a time the only good thing was taking baths .... Not very eco lol

In a more positive note, shopping could help ! By the way I just found out this brand FSJshoes. As I love retro and vintage reproduction (and big chunky heels) that's awesome ;)

I 'll show you some of my favs ! 

About FSJ shoes

Funny she jill(FSJ) is a shoes brand, synchronized with the international fashion, taking super fashion design as well as an attractive price. FSJ means extremely “ Innovation “ or " Adventurous ", which symbolizes the modern women's life characteristics of pursuit for fashion and vitality. We aim to help women realize their dream of fashion and pursuit of quality.
Launched in 1998, FSJ provides a complete assortment of FSJ merchandise to clients internationally. FSJ insists on the quality and upholds the excellent high standard of crafts.
The sexy and fearless cut, fashionable design, and exceptional craftsmanship struck a chord with a sophisticated clientele makes FSJ become welcomed by customers and enjoys good reputation among the society.
FSJ, spares no effort to make every product special and impeccable.

Hope you guys like it ,


Friday, March 29, 2019

Edinburgh , Scotland, 2019

Oh Scotland , sweet Scotland, I remembered you from my last trip when I was a kid and in this memory it was a world so cold ... lol
In fact , during this little trip it was quite sunny ! So enjoyable, there's something in the air when you leave France anyway ... I dunno but I think it's chill there.

I went with my boyfriend there (btw thanks again for the pics x) had some up and downs classic Lorna, but it'll last like a very smooth and tender memory in my mind.
Speaking of up and downs, I experienced again some sort of irrational lost today like I was dissociating again I think that was it. It's a very hard feeling. You feel empty at first, and you are convinced that people don't like you or that you entirely suck sorry but that's really what it feels like...
So in this case, I try to let myself rest, cause at first you are completely blocked like you cannot move. Standing still or sitting, then I realize that I'm not really "in control" of what's happening in my brain, previously  I was overwhelmed by lots of negative thoughts. Now, I think I'm doing better. Because I have the reflex of putting myself to bed or just lay my head somewhere. It's weird bc even though I'm not really here I think I have a sort of survivor gene in me the one who says "just let go it will go away". I try to avoid taking meds at this time, only if I realize i can take a bigger action (keep in mind that moving is still something difficult to do) and that I realize that my thoughts are behind my self control and I need it.
This time, I just laid my head down.

Even though, I'm in a better place than before I'm still struggling. Today in particular, I don't really know why.