Art Déco

Hi Dears

I think it’s the end of my journey in what used to be my favourite work.

Things aren’t going well at all and I hope, and I’m sure now, that there is a better future for me elsewhere.

I cannot continue to be treated like this.

I opened my eyes, it hurt.

But I try to believe it’s for the best.

Here are some soft and sweet pictures from Joe Gaston, a splendid meeting I made recently.

I have something stuck in my throat for days because of work, I hope the feeling will slowly go away, so I needed something soft and delicate.

Love,

Lorna

xxx

 

Vinyl Urbex in Colours

Hi Dears,

Let me know what do you think of this colour version of the Kawaii Vinyl shoot !

I love it can’t wait to post it on IG.

Thanks again to DameTenebra for this beautiful work.

Outfit is thrift 

Shoes are from LaModa

P.S : by the way , I went to my new apartment today … I just loooove it ! I can’t wait to move. But in a way I am suuuper scared. I’m really not good with changes 🙈 

Love,

Lorna

xxx

 

Urbex

Hi Dears,

This is my latest collaboration with DameTenebra. I just had to do some very kitsch and dark fet-ish outfit since this skirt is getting a bit tight for me 😅 

I gained 10kgs since I started to get back to antidepressants but I have to say yes it works. I am finally going back to a life that I love and finally accomplished something great. Thanks to my dad. Yes dears, I’m finally home owner!

Well I’m in Paris so the place is sort of … inexistant lol

It’s very very small. But I don’t care. It’s mine. I have my tiny house 🖤

I could never afford this if it weren’t for my dad.

And who’s gonna paint her walls black now ? 😬 

Love,

Lorna

xxx

 

Dirndl

Hi Dears,

Here are some pictures from my last trip to Tours where I met Faallaway.

Very nice person we connected a lot on a neurodivergent level 👽🖤

If you’re in France definitely book a session with her !

I wanted something a bit cold and a touch of « bricks » so I’m happy about what we did. The dress is vintage and comes from a real Dirndl shop from Austria 🇦🇹 

Speak soon with big (huge for me) news!

Love,

Lorna

xxx

 

Reloaded

Hi Dears,

I was waiting and waiting for the perfect timing to drop those images from the fabulous Amandine (Dame Tenebra) with a touch of cyber goth/punk and futuristic wave which I can’t deny makes me think of Matrix

 -guilty pleasure- 🙊 🥷🏻 

I wanted to feel reloaded to post them.

I think now is the perfect timing.

Will soon be out of this hospital, will soon be a house owner, will soon start and build my own life.

With a little bit of hope but plenty of control freaked plans yeah we can finally make it.

Love you all,

Lorna

xxx

 

Battle with Honour

Hi Dears,

I’m super pleased to publish these pictures while being where I am right now.

If you haven’t watched my last YouTube video, I got a bit of rest and left some of my stress and anxiety behind me in Paris.

I don’t want to fear the outside world in the end so I know this is a temporary situation but it feels very much like a battle I’m winning against myself and I can say I’m very proud of this.

I wish you have a brightful start of the summer like me ☺️ 🌞 

Photo credits go to the amazing Comtesse Léa

Cosplay latex suit is from Catalyst Latex

Love,

Lorna 

xxx

 

Film Noir

 

Hi Dears,

I don't have much to say except that these days haven't been much fun for me. Nearly 6 months I'm feeling this complete sorrow in me and lemme tell you , it's no fun.

I have nevertheless accepted the situation (well, a tiny bit more than weeks ago) and even if it still hurts I feel like I'm no longer moving backwards.

Let's not get our hopes too high cause I'm not saying I'm moving forwards but I like to think I do.

I'm doing all I can to get back to a place where I can enjoy serenity and pleasure; and that's why i had this glimpse of hope again. I will be on holiday this summer, visiting some places I really wanted to visit and there's no way I'm taking this sorrow with me. There's no way I will waste my precious holiday memories, the one thing that really make me love life (travelling) because of this depression or whatever you want to call it.

I like the past. The past is retro, sparkling with memories, comforting even with nostalgia. 

But it's time I take a step back from this black and grey motion picture and face what I can do in the future.

(Even when the Dark Side Lorna really want to add : what future, were all doomed eventually)

Anyway, 

Take care,

Love

xxx

The two-sided-Lorna

Photo credits: LeilaNl

ECSTASY OF THE •BLUE• GOLD

Hi Dears,

I’ve never been a fan of tough-love. I’ll always claim it’s not the answer to our troubles. But, sometimes it’s the only way for me. I will moan for a certain time yes. But knowing this will finally sink in. I need time. But you should know it’s not in vain.

Like a seed you implanted in me it will still grow. I will bloom and end up turning this into a lesson and a way to find resilience.

Even in the roughest times, I not only do it for myself but for you. I have in me this power of rekindle the tiniest flame, maybe covered in ashes, but from dust to light, it shall rise again.

Even at my most apathetic stage, when everything looks dark and at its nearest end, something tells me : nope. No, Lorna, it’s not your time.

I rage about it, i strongly disagree. Why wouldn’t I ? I’m fed up of taking what feels like a million slap in the face.

I call 𝑯𝒐𝒑𝒆 the blue love in me.

Credits photo: LeilaNl

Outfit: Lottie Latex

Love,

Lorna

xxx

 

Ghost in my shell

Hi Dears,

I had a blast this weekend ! Made me come out of my shell for the first time in months.

Let me explain.

So I had this concert planned for months, and I wanted to go so bad as it was kind of an emo revival to me and I wanted to keep this going since last summer, when I realized it made me feel very good to accept a part of my past. Which I found a bit ridiculous at first, but damn so many memories when I listen to A day to remember though haha

So the concert was actually Bring Me the Horizon, and they mainly played "new" songs which weren't out yet when i was in high school, it's a bit more "pop"and famous than the firsts albums but I think that's how they got such a great enthusiasm from the youth now. Which leads me to the most important aspect of this weekend to me:

I finally released some tension off my shoulders and I turned my bitterness the other way round.

I used to be kind of fed up with the newest generations because they got everything very easily from Spotify, when we worked our ass off to have access to some part of subculture, "copied" our looks -- that we used to have (or still have) when we were considered as outcasts and being bullied. Blablabla, all that boomer crap.

I had troubles with accepting that this can be part of a new 2020 trend. 

But as I looked at the crowd , and met new people (Lorna made new friends lol) I finally got to the point that the atmosphere was kind and cute. There were no race of who knows better than who and people having a judgmental behaviour like I so often see in the metal subculture. And goth.

So I said to myself "you know what Lorna, remember when all those elders gave you a hard time to be accepted and when you desparetly seeked their approval?" Let's not do this to them. And this is what I felt in the crowd. So, of course, there were some groupies (but lol I'm so one of them tbh) and young people drinking without being really selfconscious (ugh, but that's maybe because I don't drink anymore it annoys me now lol).

I still felt that our generation, the Millenials, were very gentle towards the Gen Z and Alpha, like wanted to discuss and share songs and lyrics it was very appeasing to me to be in a soft environment like this. I think as in my workplace I'm getting stressed out a lot, I needed that.

Anyway, regarding the Gen, I notice how we could do some changes.

Instead of having the same behaviour than the Gen X who are doing the same as the Boomers "yes but that's not how we did it", "back in the days" all that crap. Instead of making someone feel like shit, why not just hold their hand and share what we can have in common.

I don't know, just some random thoughts. It might be a bit too naive you will say. But for

 Angry Bitter Lorna, this is means a lot.

Meaning I can feel the wind changing and maybe say hello to my opposite side once again. 

Shiny Happy Lorna 

xxx

Love,

Lorna

Credits Photo: Jordan Dorey

(How amazing that the first pic looks literally like the Bi-flag right)

Latex dress from Pandora Deluxe

 

Memento Mori

 

Hi guys,

A couple of rough last weeks I had. I came back to work after one month of break and rest and it was brutal. Didn't really know if they wanted me here, feeling guilty for a lot of reasons, and just well, for being here and being me.

I have this constant feeling, of being torn between what is real and what is fictional, what is in my head or what's really happening, not knowing if missing a person means they're gone, forever.

Not knowing what is the line between life and death.

But for all I know I'm still standing and still active, trying to do my best and to do what makes me happy.

Cause I'm still here, on this effin planet so lets make it a bit more bearable, shall we ?

Don't have much to add tonight,

Except that how amazing is this first 2023 series from a photoshoot I did with Dame Tenebra right ?

🖤

Credits to her, for being pure talent xx

Love,

Lorna

xxx

Hello 2023

Hello Dears,

Ok so I made it this far , who knew ?

Everyday I feel like I believe a little less and a little less.

I hope this year there will be a day that I will go back to be in a stable and neutral mood. I thought it was boring but now I missed it. I cant live like this.

I have to much weight on my shoulders.

Hating life is really not the best feeling of all. When you feel like you had lost everything.

And you complain and complain and complain…

So you cant even reach out anymore cause everybody’s fed up with you answering the question “are you ok?” With a simple no.

People like you better when you’re up there. When you’re fun and happy.

They magically all disappear when you’re down. Cause you’re not able to listen to their own problems.

So guess what ?

I’ve done this before I can do it again.

No social life, family that drains me energy, a regular work so I can afford to travel and do stuff on my own.

But that’s ok, I ll be back to be a lone wolf. I can do that.

Cheers to 2023 and loneliness (for a change).

Love,

Lorna

xxx

Pictures by the amazing Cecile Clavel